Creeping Panic Attack

I've had a lot of stress going on recently. I haven't really been myself. I can't pinpoint one thing that's been stressing me out, really it's been loads of combination of things from a family member needing to have a serious operation to remove a cancerous lump to feeling judged and isolated at work. Obviously …

Inside my bubble

My bubble's supposed to protect me But all it does is distance me I want it to keep me safe From the madness in this place Though it feeds into my fears Bringing me close to tears I wish to connect And not feel like a reject Every time I try to converse It never …

From an autistic adult to all teachers

Dear Teachers There are so many pressures on you to meet data targets, pass ofsted reports and show student progression. There's so much you have to do in one day; take a register, answer emails, reports, data entries, oh yeah and teach. My reason of writing to you was not to remind you how much …

The fine line: Challenge and Failure

When does challenge turn into setting someone up for failure? Challenge In my role as a LSA, or more commonly used term TA, I am all for challenging the SEN students I work with because they will become adults and life don't sugar coat! I have incredibly high expectations no matter what their need is. …

Me and my red scarf

I lay on the floor screaming at the top of my lungs as the room around me was spinning. The sound of squeaky wheels along the ground shrieking at me. The smell of perfume smacking me in the face as a pointy nosed women glided past me, looking at me with a lowered brow as …

Back to work – overload and exhaustion

I've been back at work for almost a week and while off for the summer holidays I forgot how much sensory input I have to take in and how to deal with it. After half an hour in the staffroom on the first day I had a pounding headache. While in the staffroom one of …

Taking the plunge: part 2

So in my original taking the plunge post I was pursuing an autism diagnosis. By the end of the post I was left with the question of where to go next; back to the GP, private or take a break from pursuing a diagnosis. I chose to go back to my GP. About a week …

Autism – Haiku (inspired) poems

I like the 5-7-5 rhythm of a haiku so I wrote a selection of autism themed poems based on that rhythm. What is autism? Just another day living With a unique mind I am not abstract I am a literal human So that's how I think Spinning around fast Creates a wonderful high Why don't you …

Why do I wear my cardigan back to front?

Weird title I know but trust me it will make sense. I've been out quite a lot the past couple of weeks since it's the school holidays and I don't have to work. I recently saw the film Finding Dory, I'm not a film reviewer and will never profess to be but this film was …

Others’ words > my words

I feel right now that my words are not adequate, almost useless. I have a lot on my mind and have been out the house quite a lot (very unusual for me I'm very much a recluse) and I'm about to be out the house for the next two days. I have words jumbled in …